Contemporary Romance

Review: Neanderthal Marries Human

Neanderthal Marries Human
Neanderthal Marries Human by Penny Reid
Dali’s review & rating: 5 of 5 stars

I could gorge on books like this! What an incredibly beautiful, sexy, swoony, smart and funny story about family, friends and love! I’ll be floating on a sweet, fluffy cloud of happiness every time I think about it.

“I’ve been yours and you’ve been mine since that moment. Today….” I felt his shoulders lift on a shrug before he continued. “Today we’re just making it official.”

Broody, taciturn, smart, sexy Quinn Sullivan is wildly in love with Janie Morris and as with the rest of his endeavors he’s determined and will stop at nothing to get her to be his wife and the mother of his eight to ten children. He would also like to do this in the most efficient way possible in the next twenty four hours after her acceptance and bypass all unnecessary drama and gratuitous wedding related customs. Can he convince Janie that they unequivocally belong together for better or worse for the rest of their lives and that they shouldn’t have to wait for their happiness?

“Proposing is like giving someone your dick and a sharp knife, then waiting to see what they do next.”
“This is the tattoo of life decisions.”
“Tattoo of life decisions?”
“Yes. Tattoo. Marriage is the forever and permanent branding of one person to another.”

Until McHotpants A.K.A., Quinn Sullivan came along, Janie Morris had been constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop in every aspect of her life. So after his very unconventionally romantic and decidedly sexy proposal Janie negotiates for a short but conventional engagement with all the traditions in order to create 2.4 years’ worth of stress between them in order to be able to move forward with the certainty that they’ll be able to withstand whatever hardship life throws at them. Can find her fearlessness and embrace the happiness having Quinn in her life brings?

“I love you, Quinn Sullivan. You are precious to me, and I will love you always. And if I die before you, I plan to haunt you… Perhaps you could learn to make pottery so that posthumously we can use the wheel together in a sensual, mystically transcendent display of affection.”

I am completely and absolutely in love with these characters, series and author. I’m not sure how I’ll fit reading all her books in the next couple of months but they’re so sweet and hilariously addicting I’m sure I’ll find a way.

“I’d expected Sir McHotpants Von Grabby Hands as soon as the limo door was closed. However, what I got instead was Sir McCoolpants Von No Touchy.”

Neanderthal Marries Human starts right after Neanderthal Seeks Human happily left off with an Epilogue in Quinn’s point of view, having Janie comfortably settled in her job and relationship with Quinn and with a resolute Quinn wanting Janie in his life forever. This is an extension of their happy ever after, which according to Quinn could have been done in 24 hours but having Janie as his quirky better half included all stages of wedding: proposal, planning, meeting the parents, bachelor/bachelorette party and the wedding itself.

“You have an incendiary effect on me, and I’m quite uncomfortably aroused right now. Your biometrics might be completely unaffected by my presence, but all you have to do is call me Kitten and I experience vasomotor symptoms.”

This prolonged engagement fostered a better communication and understanding of each other and of the people who love them. From healing old wounds with Quinn’s parents and Janie coming to terms with her dysfunctional family, to Quinn’s full disclosure of his past businesses and Janie facing more of her fears. Of course this story has as much heart as it had wacky and sexy moments.

“It was you, Janie… You and your Medusa hair and your honey colored eyes. It was your questions, your intelligence, and your insatiable curiosity. It was your goodness and sweetness, your honesty and trust.”

I fell in love with both Quinn and Janie in the previous book and I love them even more now. It’s impossible not to laugh and love Janie’s trivial facts diatribes and adore her huge heart. Even though most people only view Quinn as grumpy and stoic, it was beautiful how he sees and loves Janie and how he tries to be a better and deserving man for her, and let’s not forget those incredibly steamy moments between the two!!!

“Sir McSwoonypants… Shirtless, pants unzipped, boxers pulled low—he was chocolate cake with chocolate sauce and chocolate ganache, with chocolate mousse and chocolate cookie crust…so delicious.”

Friends from the previous book and family members got together to help celebrate Quinn and Janie’s love which was wild, funny and touching. I couldn’t stop laughing during one particular part in the bachelorette party and I completely misty eyed when friends and family expressed their love towards the couple.

“Be beautiful for yourself, Janie. And only if you want to. If a man is worthy of you, he’ll see more beauty in who you are than in what you look like.”

There were so many incredible moments I highlighted that deserved to be shared and remembered. I can’t recommend this book enough for anyone who wants a lighthearted yet touching, funny, sweet romance.

“Nice dress.” I held his gaze and returned, “Wait till you see what’s underneath.”

Neanderthal Marries Human is book 1.5 in the Knitting in the City series by author Penny Reid. Even though it’s numbered as a middle book, this is not a novella. It is a full length novel, told from McHotpants and Sexy-Brains, errr from both points of view. It is a sequel to Neanderthal Seeks Human and should not be read as a standalone.

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